
Man Plans. God Laughs.
Number one child recently turned twenty one (yes that makes me feel ancient!) and during a recent conversation with a friends dad, he asked me about my very tall offspring’s plans for the future. Future in my laid back sons’ reality equates to what food he might be ordering later (jerk) and did he book the gym. But it sent me a tad twitchy for a short while because I started to suddenly feel like normal people do; you know the ones that like to know what’s coming and where they are going to be in five years time. Or in this case scenario where is my firstborn going to be? But then I remembered we don’t really do plans, so no need to panic. (Big sigh of relief!)
I told my friend and her dad that there’s a saying, “man makes plans and God laughs”. They hadn’t heard it; I think they thought I’d made it up (something I definitely might do) but it’s actually a Jewish proverb. I like it, not the concept but the truth of it. I love the gentle humour, the warning that it whispers and the ancient knowing in this small handful of words. We can replace the God word with something higher than myself if reading that makes you a tad twitchy.
I do love the idea of manifesting and I will confess that I do partake and preach to the house. You need to have dreams and goals and wants and wish lists and vision boards. Many of the large stash of books that I own instruct that I ask, believe, release and will receive anything that I desire (anything that’s for my highest good that is!) I may still be waiting on a few larger items (a horse); the universe isn’t as speedy as Amazon prime.
I am a sensible hard-working mountain goat, the Capricorn in me has always made me feel a bit geriatric who knows maybe I will go all Benjamin Button and start getting younger as I get older. I am happiest when there is food in the fridge (although they keep eating it all!) and there’s plenty of loo rolls (no one else cares, they would if I wasn’t on it!) but I guess overall I live fairly mindfully day to day. My most serious planning for the future consists of making sure I am booked in with Kat for kundalini yoga every Monday for the foreseeable future. The introvert that dwells within doesn’t mind staying in (like we have much choice anymore) but I am also happy to go for spontaneous cocktails on a rainy school night to celebrate some happy news. I would love to book a holiday to somewhere magical and sunny but there doesn’t seem much point. What I am trying to say is my personality type the serious one that craves security and the need to feed should really enjoy planning her life away; I should have the kids moved out and moved on; shouldn’t I?
In the past whenever I have had a serious plan God got a fit of the giggles. My husband and I laugh that we are way past plan B more like plan W. Even before I found yoga I learnt that you’ve got to go with the flow and trust the process. I am a massive believer that one thing leads to something else (often better) and if it’s too much of a struggle then there is probably a reason for that. Look for the signs, don’t force things to fit. What’s meant for you won’t pass you by is a true saying.
Nobody plans an unexpected pregnancy, or to be in a crash (car, plane, rollercoaster, financial. We have endless possibilities here) who plans to find an unwanted lump or schedules a heart attack? No mother orders up a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Floods, fires, earthquakes, hurricanes all not on the wish list thank you very much. Natural disasters aren’t called acts of God for nothing. What kid planned to get bullied or managed moved? Who decided it would be fun to end up homeless or addicted. Humans don’t like having their dreams shattered but life happens. The plot twists keep on coming. We don’t even plan on getting old! Sudden death has to be the ultimate kick in the teeth; sudden death never made it into the diary. That’s how weird we all are as a species I speak from experience; we just don’t see that one coming. I think the winner in” that wasn’t part of the plan” has got to be death. Wonder if we’d all live better lives if our expiry dates were pencilled in somewhere, What if you could take a peek, would you?
This year has thrown us a bit of a contender for the most unwanted visitor has it not? I have decided not to mention its name as I am trying to live in a germ-free reality where toilet rolls are never in short supply and hugging hasn’t become extinct or a crime. Maybe God has a very funny sense of humour; he’s having one hell of a laugh. All of our plans have been juggled and shredded and stomped on and then some. Maybe one day it will all make perfect sense I hope so. I know that none of this was in the plan and I know I want to fill my diary with dates to see more than the six people I share my home with, (I love you all but I’m a people person.) I know I want to do all of the simple ordinary things that I have spent a lifetime taking for granted with the people I love most, and maybe a few extraordinary things too. That is my plan.
I hope people find a way through this mess, I hope they don’t lose hope. I hope things really do happen for a reason. I hope they don’t cancel Christmas.
I am wishing for better things. Hold on tight.
Stay well, much love
Amanda x
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