It is what it is
Sunday morning I opened my eyes and my husband asked where I wanted to go, he was telepathically reading my thoughts. I had an overwhelming urge to walk and have the wind blow off some stuck residue of negativity that clung to me from the previous day. The feeling that I wanted to be in different surroundings must have been powerful, I was thinking flower market, and we ended up in Brick Lane.
We were way too early for everything, our spontaneous Sunday escape had us up and out at the crack of dawn only to discover nothing much happens on a Sunday until midday!
After a bit of roaming we found some stalls in an indoor market selling a selection of arty crafty items made from imagination and with love, as ex market traders that have tried over the years a million little ways to make money, we pondered on how bloody hard it must be to make a living.
We found www.rebelpencil.com a stall selling refreshingly non-uplifting printed artwork. It spoke to the cynical sarcastic Amanda that is the naughty twin of nice cheerleader Mandy. Yes, I love a motivational quote we like posting them on Instagram and printing them on Yoga Leggs’ sweatshirts but I also have a warped sense of humour.
Try everything once (except heroin) agreed, fuck you and your positive vibes, okay honest! They made me laugh but the one I purchased was, I tried my best and failed miserably.
As the hour struck twelve we ended up in a pub drinking Guinness and blackcurrant; we felt like we’d been there all day already so didn’t feel too bad about the early alcohol consumption. Since my giving up drinking indoors unless it’s an occasion for Lent’s declaration we do seem to be frequenting more pubs of late!
So we had a little moment and laughed about some of the monumental failures of our lives and it occurred to me that every perceived failure is just a lesson, a reroute, an escape from some soul-crushing shit that you probably shouldn’t have been doing in the first place.
I also don’t think I always try my best not at things that get graded anyway. I put my best into things I consider important and my view of living a successful life won’t necessarily be your view. So much attention is instilled into doing well, passing tests and over achieving no wonder we feel like giant losers when we’re not passing with flying colours. Oh the pressure!
But where are you at in your humanity studies, how are you doing? You don’t need a psychology degree to see in a person’s eyes or hear in their voice when they’ve had enough. We don’t get an A for being compassionate or intuitive or tolerant, we should. Marks out of ten for reading the room.
The reason for my dodgy mood came from a feeling of personal failure on an emotional level. It took me a day to spin that sadness into a lesson learnt. To turn that disappointment into a little nugget of golden treasure.
I and my twelve-year-old son have been playing a little game of it is was it is, seeing how often we can use the phrase in a silly voice in the appropriate context. We reflected that everyone’s level of ‘it is what it is’ is personal to them, we all have our limits and boundaries and what is a molehill for you is Mount Everest to me.
I think there are no wrong turns. My telepathic husband and I have some good stories to tell. We have under our belt some epic fails. Scarred by these life experiences he has decided that I am not allowed to display my new artwork anywhere near him, he’s also highly superstitious.
Lighten up is all I’m saying, embrace the twists and turns of life, and re-evaluate what may first appear to your mind as a failure but may actually have been a blessing in disguise. Look past the lack and the loss for the lesson. Trust that you’ll get to your destination even if there are a few bumps in the road. Don’t be afraid to fail miserably.
And don’t try Heroin
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