I am writing about the craziness of our minds on World Mental health day, crazy hey? The general consensus of the moment seems to be one of overwhelming emotional turmoil; I know this because I talk a lot. To friends, random strangers queuing at the post office anyone who wants to share really. I also listen. On my little yoga journey and spiritual quest, I have found myself in meditations and sound healing gong baths where the magic of the moon and the planets and how they affect our ability to cope and stay sane are explained a little. At this moment in time, we are in the midst of a space storm and Venus is in retrograde!!!! Thank God it’s not a full moon, we’d all be howling. Can this outer worldly activity really be responsible for this shake-up of emotions and the intense moods a lot of us are feeling right now? Or are some of us just being more honest and sharing our woes?
We live in a time of more, nothing is simple no one is satisfied. Everyone wants bigger and better and exaggerated, or is that just because I live in Essex (joke). We are all meant to be living this fairytale lifestyle. I’m nostalgic for my seventies childhood where life was smaller and simpler and less but more. I know I sound like a dinosaur. But I liked that my school friends didn’t care what make of jumper you wore or if you only had one. That we only had ten pence for an emergency phone call home that we would have wasted ordering a stranger from the phonebook a cab they didn’t need! I’m glad there was no fortnite or iPhones and the boys hung out with the girls outside the local library. I’m sure we never took out a single book! I’m pleased that grievances were aired face to face and not over twitter. I’m thankful that my eyelashes were my own, electric blue (the 80s) but my own.
I actually asked my husband to run away with me to Spain this week, sell up and buy a beach bar, he said he wants to drink mojitos not make them. Fair point. You can’t run away. Tut tut, what would Buddha say…? I’m still working towards my calm and peaceful mind. We also live in the time of the motivational quote, Hell we even use them on our Yoga Leggs sweaters. Some days I love them, I share enough of them on Instagram. I think they help. That’s me no surprises there. I love words, they move me. Song lyrics, passages from books I’m inspired I’m choked I am in awe. Other days I don’t want to see another one in this lifetime. Either that or I want to share the dark ones, the sweary sarcastic ones (very unprofessional)! That’s me of late I’m all Love and light or the main character in the exorcist.
The usual “I’m fine” doesn’t seem sufficient at the moment, Is it better to swallow down the truth or blurt it all out. You don’t want to feed the negativity it’s a hungry monster. You don’t want to bore people or God forbid bare your soul. Equally, who are you lying too? Lying is never a good thing. The stuff that hurts your heart will fester, it’s not welcome. Get rid. I like honesty, you can work with honesty. And remind yourself constantly that this too shall pass…
Change is constant, it’s craved and dreaded welcomed and shunned in equal measure. But it’s constant. It slows us down and pushes us on, always teaching and encouraging growth. The yogi says go with the flow, the yogi is right. Its weird this existence, if you are lucky enough to reach old bones think how many characters you’ve played in this melodramatic manuscript. No wonder we go a little insane from time to time; we are trying to navigate our way through to the final chapters. Plot twists aplenty. When our library gang meet up for cheap drinks in Walthamstow (keeping it real) it’s nice to reminisce and be thirteen again and jump back a few chapters. Not very mindful yes I know!
Earlier this week I shared mat space with a group of beautiful women, a few of us were feeling a bit raw should I say, (I blame the space storm) and what occurred to me was this…
Some of us are yearning for a soul mate or coming to terms with divorce or just trying to make a marriage good. Some of us need to learn patience or light a rocket up our backsides. Some of us need to slow down. For every woman obsessing on becoming a mother, there will be one who’s sleep deprived or wondering if she even likes the child she’s raised. Someone will be grieving whether it’s a twenty year anniversary or a recent passing. Someone will have disease eating away at them or be reliant on a habit they know they should break. We are all here just part of the story trying hard not to lose the plot. And thankfully some of us will be content, loving life and full of the joys. We should give ourselves a break and each other. And be grateful we are still in the book.
Everybody hurts sometimes. Ride the storm.
Love and light with a little bit of madness thrown in