This was the response from my 5-year-old son after asking him to put his shoes on so we could leave our gorgeous little attic room seafront hotel we’d stayed in for the weekend of my husband’s birthday.
Looking into Rafferty’s eyes and hearing his little voice so full for the most simple things in life, my heart absolutely melted and I just wanted to sweep him into my arms. But I didn’t always respond like this. My desperation at wanting to get going, move on, be somewhere else, always driven by an out of date way of processing life had me missing a lot on these simple, yet life-changing experiences. Things I was blindly unaware of as I allowed myself to be overwhelmed by my emotions and a nervous system that was whacked out.
I’ve always been a go, go, GO! kinda person (realising now through the hormonal work I offer to women, that I favoured the ovulation phase of my cycle which is a very social and active time). Flying here, there, especially with my work. But what I’ve realised NOW is how I was using up energy unnecessarily because I was being too emotional to see what I really wanted and not educating myself on how to do it.
I realise NOW how I’ve spent so much time focusing on the things that bought me the least happiness, because I became addicted to the outcome, my nervous system running full pelt and my limited understanding of what I could achieve in life. Through studying my menstrual cycle, hormones and the impact it had on my nervous system, I was able to soften the habits that kept me locked in that spiral of doing too much and feeling spent from it.
The last couple of years I have been a wonderful eye opener for me, through my own admission and self-work, that I’m enough as I am. That I’m good enough as I am. That I’m a GREAT human being. A feeling obtainable by anyone on this planet when encouraged, inspired and supported to do so.
And that’s what allowed me to pick up my pillow and start that pillow fight with my son that made us both so happy and created a memory I hope we both never forget.
Abi Adams coaches women through their menstrual cycle and psychology using movement and the many holistic practices she has studied over the last 20 years, which has seen her become the mum she always wanted to be. She offers private sessions or group coaching through This is ME – My Evolution, as well as workshops and retreats which can be found on her website: https://abiadams.co.uk/store/